Hello my loved ones...

I hope everyone is doing well, and enjoying all the wonderful blessings in
their lives. I'm grateful to you all and wish I could express my love and
appreciation to all of you.  I apologize for my horrible English and
writing, but I pray that the spirit will dwell within my words as I report
and talk about a few things.

There is a quote that a few of my missionary friends and I often say. Some
others may know it, and a grin will come to your face. Otherwise you can
enjoy it now.

"I knew a man who once said...'Death smiles at us all...All a man can do is
smile back"

As I am approaching the end of my mission, I don't really know how to
express myself.  If I had the strength and ability I would be a full time
missionary for the rest of my days of my life.  But, there is a time and
season for all. I know my time is coming to the close. Granted, it is not
over yet. But I am rather weak right now. My companion worries a lot
sometimes. I've lost a big desire to eat...tastes the same. I feel like I'm
wasting time, but I don't have the energy to do anything else.  I've been
reviewing my mission and performing my final accounting to Heavenly Father
for each area and companion. Accompanied with much time on my knees, many
fasts, scripture study and reflection. The blessings that I have received
are countless. I love my Heavenly Father so very much. I am so thankful for
His son Jesus Christ, our Savior, and the opportunity we all have to change
and become whole through him.  I... am unable to express and elaborate on
the many ways the Lord has helped me in my life.  I am a soul that is
constantly falling down, but can always rely on my Redeemer to pick me up
and help me press forward.

I told my district a couple days ago, I don't really feel like I belong
anywhere.  I know my mission is coming to an end and I must leave. But the home and life I have forsaken to come on my mission has been away for some time now.  I don't feel a sense of belonging at home either. I am very lost right now.  It is an interesting feeling. But no doubt in my mind, when I see my family again, play with my dog, eat mexican food, and start serving
the Lord like many of you faithful members...I will feel that sense of
comfort and belonging.  I trust my God, and know He will continue to provide for me.

My mission has been one of splendor. I lived by a few things on my mission.
I can trace them back to the priesthood brethren in my own home, the advice and council I was given right before I reported to the MTC.  My
multi-talented brother gave me a book mark which had inscribed a quote by
Winston Churchill.
              "Never, Never, Never Quit"

I took that with much seriousness in all aspects of this work.  love my
brother and thank him for his wise gift. I have taught many training
meetings on this very topic. It has helped me through many trials.

The next is from my Wonderful Father. Oh how I love and admire him. I wish that I could be half the man he is one day. As I hugged my parents in the MTC, and gave them a 2 year farewell...my Dad ( I don't if he even remembers or not but) told me 2 things.
          " Don't hold anything back..."
          " ....And come home with nothing left."

I am exhausted.  I have given my thoughts, life, feelings, efforts all to
this work in testifying of our Savior Jesus Christ. I have lived everyday
according to those 2 things. I thank Heavenly Father for an Amazing example of Christ-Like qualitites of a Mission President, for many patient loving companions, extremely hard trials that buckled me to my knees to learn and rely on my God, and the wonderful people of this island. I have sweated, bleed, and shed many tears on this island. I gave myself never thinking about going home, I tried my best, and although fell short in many many areas, I glorify my God, and Testify that He lives.  He has made it known unto me by the Power of the Holy Ghost. He has given me experiences that could never be bought with money or fame.  I love my mission. I have given it everything I have. I have tried so very hard for the liberty and salvation for these people, helping them prepare for Eternal Life. I love everyone and everything that has been in my mission.

Although I am grateful to the Lord for helping me through this time. I know
and have learned it is only the beginning. I have not just planned to give
my mission to my God. But I have truly learned how to consecrated my life
for the cause of Christ. For the building up God's Kingdom on this earth.
To unite families for eternity and bring the sweet taste of the Atonement to all. I look forward to continual learning, growing, and much service till
the end of my days. I'm so very thank full for the Atonement, and know it is
real. I have received a New Heart, A new Life, and a forgiveness of all my
sins and mistakes. There is only one way to do this work...The Fathers way.
The scripture reads, He that loses his life for my sake, shall find it. Not,
He that loses his life for 2 years. I pray and hope that the Lord will
continue to guide me through my life, as I strive will all efforts to
continue to be his disciple.

I think I could go on forever about my mission. I think I could go on
forever how much the Lord will bless anyone who will give their live for the
cause of Christ. There is no better experience then giving it all up, and
raising the banner of Truth. I love this church, and testify it is the true
church.  I love it.

I look forward to seeing my loved ones again. I look forward to continue
walking down the prepared path that Heavenly Father has given me. I love my Family, I love my missionary friends, I love my members here and at home. I love you all.

I Testify that God lives. I know that He is the Father of our spirits and
loves us so very much. I know that He hears all prayers, no matter how long
or short. I know that He sent His son Jesus Christ to atone for our sins,
pains, and unfair circumstances. I know the Atonement is real because I have felt it, and it has cleansed my life. I know these 2 beings exist because in 1820, a humble boy of limited learning had enough faith to ask God what to do.  I know that Joseph Smith restored this church and translated convincing evidence of the divinity there of by the power of God. I know that record is the Book of Mormon, the stick of Ephraim, the Word of God, our Iron Rod. I have read the book 15 times in 2 years. I have read it in another language. I have prayed each time and many times during and asked our Maker if it be true. The answer has been confirmed it is true every time.  I know this church is the only true church on the earth. I testify, love, and support our Prophet and leader President Monson. Truly anyone can see Jesus Christ in his countenance.  He is the watchman on the Tower. I know He represents our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.  I know that the Church of Jesus Christ is Gods kingdom on the earth today.

I know these things are true. It is not just a belief, I know they are true.
I give all credit to my God, and Glorify His name, and humbly stand as a
witness that He lives, and I know all these things to be the truth.

 I am going to give everything I can that I have left these next few days. I
never quit, I didn't hold anything back, and soon will I have nothing left.
I have fought a good fight, and I have kept the Faith.

Now on to the next....

I love you all, I hope to repay in some way the kindness that you all have
shown me. I am you servant, friend, brother, and son. I love you all very
much. You are in my Prayers always. My God smile upon you all, for I know
that He loves you all.

Love,
Elder Ryan Tarver
Tang Jia Nuo ZhangLao

Ps.   Hurrah for Israel!